The next move

I had my oral in the morning. I got 90 marks, which is 1 mark short from the A+ I was aiming for, but I suppose its good enough.

The teacher said I had problems with sh-/s, zh-/z, ch-/c. Hhmmm...I thought I was ok...but I guess I wasn't.

The more ironic thing is, the friend whom I have always been 'tutoring' got better comments and higher marks.

I guess that is the difference between consciousness and complacency?

Sometimes life is like that. We tend to think too highly of ourselves.

...

R told me to give the process a few days. After all, didn't they say that they would complete it in 10 days?

Yes, they will complete it in 10 days. Which means if I had got it, I would have heard about it.

But I haven't heard anything.

So I think...

yeap, you know what I think.

Is that fine?

Yeah, kind of.

Kind of because I don't think it is so much of the job as the fact that I didn't get selected. You know what I mean?

I don't know if this is a manifestation of the altered ego or whatever, but I do feel disgruntlement wheneve I think of this and my previous scholarships lapses.

In what way am I inferior?

Hahaha...sorry, as you can tell, I am feeling quite egoistic today.

Never mind me. I can be quite unfathomable sometimes.

...

It is Wed, my day off.

Just when I was happily contemplating about the change in work hours following the termination of my sat class, I was told yesterday that I will continue to take the class.

One of the students had called in to request that I continue to take the class.

Aiyah. So sad. So sad because I was hoping to work shorter hours on Sat.

But that aside, I have been trying to decipher the significance of that encounter. What is God saying?

I don't know.

Anyhow, I think I will take a nap before I find some time to exercise, and try to study my Japanese. It can get tiring sometimes, and I do wonder about the significance of learning Japanese. The class is fast. I don't know anyone. And it is on a Sunday.

I just hope it will be useful the way it can be.

But maybe I really shouldn't think so much.

Maybe I should just concentrate on my next resume and the next advertisement.